SunCity SEOcon was traditionally an underground Arizona SEO meetup that happened in the heat of the summer, during the day, to enjoy splashing around with cold beers, some good ole BBQ, and to pick the brains of local search marketing experts.  Year after year we had a blast.  This year, we opened it up to the public.

We’re keeping the theme similar, a good mix of fun in the sun / SEO conference / networking event.  It’s nothing like any other conferences.

Here’s a long winded analogy to kind of give you an idea of the way this thing will feel, as compared to the other known conferences.  SES is like a band playing a sold out stadium. PubCon is like a local band who hit the big time and come back to their home city’s biggest club. SMX is like a rave. Elite Retreat is like an intimate club with a bad ass band… SunCity SEOcon is like Snoop Dogg playing at MTV Beach Party.

I gotta say, I’m pretty excited about the whole thing.  The speakers are the real deal on this thing.  I mean, check out this allstar line up!

It’s going to be crazy.  Register now before it’s sold out!

Having your identity stolen is far more damaging than just losing money.  I never realized how much of a tangled web finances and real life obligations where until I had to rebuild that web from scratch.  When a thief cleared out my checking account from 5 different Bank of America branches using a fake ID, it basically turned my life upside down.

I learned the hard way.  There are lots of things I could have, should have, and would have done better to avoid some of this mess. But I trusted the system and I did what I thought I was supposed to do.  I had no idea that the system could fail me as hard as it did.  Regardless, even the most paranoid person can get be a victim.  No amount of looking over your shoulder can guarantee that a really motivated criminal can’t screw up your life.

The Time Drain - You Pay for Other People’s Mistakes

The amount of work that you have to do to regain and protect your identity is a lot bigger than one might think. Get a new license.  Close bank accounts.  Open bank accounts.  Contact all credit bureaus to freeze your credit and activate fraud alerts.  Contact the FTC and report ID theft.  Call here, email here, drive here, sign this, mail this, certified mail that, change all your accounts everywhere for everything.  Update all your passwords and *remember* them. (for me, there are hundreds of those, I’m a web geek)

I found out the hard way just how bad customer service is in the US.  When dealing Corporate America your work is basically tripled. Fixing this mess takes days, not minutes or hours.

Your Tangled Financial Web

Think about this for a minute.  I have numerous mortgages, insurance policies, car payments, security systems, hosting, domains, financial products, water, electricity, phones, internet, cable, exterminator, HOA fees, etc etc.  The list goes on.  And almost every one of those bills has it’s own bill pay system.  Initially I used my Bank of America Bill-Pay to consolidate all this mess, but after a few mishaps with the system causing late payments, I moved the automation to all the external systems.  It’s a huge intertangled web.  All of it was connected to my checking account in one way or another.

So when you shut down your bank account, the onus is on YOU to rebuild this web.  Sometimes it’s hard to tell how big the web is until you step back an look at it.  It’s probably bigger than a lot of people think.  Add a new driver’s license to the mix, and things can get hairy.  Some systems rely on old information to authenticate you, so updating your identity can also cause problems when moving accounts or changing your bank information.

Online Account Management- Managing to Waste Much More of Your Time Because it’s Free

Now let’s just look at the online portion of your new part time job.  Common sense says, use a very esoteric password that would take a computer a zillion years to crack.  Okay, that’s not hard.  But some systems require at least one number and some don’t let you use numbers.  Some require at least one special character and some don’t let you use special characters.  Some force you to use exactly 8 digits.  Some are 4 digit pins that can only be numeric.  Some are email addresses (and I have like 50, including some old ones that are no longer active).  Some require you to change them at intervals, and you can never repeat a previous password… So now you have a pile of user names and passwords.  And there is no real secure way to have these stored except in your head.

Point is, just logging in to your online account management systems for various creditors and payees takes *HOURS* to accomplish.  Then their systems that bury phone numbers and force you to use awkward FAQ sections that are never even close the what you are looking for.  You’re spending an inordinate amount of time bouncing around a website, growing contempt for the company you’re trying to contact.  You can tell they are trying to avoid you from picking up that phone and calling a CSR because those cost money.

The Phone System is a People Trap Manned by Robots and Degenerates

Now, if you’re lucky, you finally found a phone number on the website.  Try calling that number to get to an actual person, and you wade through menu after menu of the same crap the website was trying to tell you.  Recorded voices trying to prevent you from talking to a real person.  Asking you to type in personal information, or God forbid your frikkin account number.  Now, like a good identity theft victim should, you’re already shredding all your mail and trying to prevent any bills from ever hitting your mailbox anyways by going paperless.  How the hell can I key in my account number if I can’t find it on the website and I shred all evidence that an account even exists?  Some of them say “No account, no problem, just type in your Social security Number!” Uhm, yeah.  I’m about to start typing my SSN now that I am completely paranoid about it.

Now, you finally figure out how to get to a person.  (tip, always try hitting 0 when asked to key in stuff and you don’t want to) And you’re on hold.  Forever.

Customer Service?  More like Call Center Quota Service…

Usually after about 5-10 minutes of navigating through the phone system (provided it didn’t hang up on your or disconnect you by “mistake”) then maybe if you’re lucky you get to a real live person.  Sometimes you get a really nice, pleasant, and somewhat sharp person who knows how to listen and is motivated to help, but that’s rare.  Usually it’s a degenerate who wants to put you on hold to keep the phone call as long as possible so they hit their call center’s connect time quota.  Or a degenerate who wants to push you off the phone as fast as possible to hit their call center’s call volume quota.

And in the worst case, you get a used care salesman who doesn’t care about your problem and is pushing you hard to buy something, to hit their call center’s sales quota.

There is No Such Thing as Privacy when You’re Just Another Number

In all, it has been an eye opener on many fronts.  Corporations that handle your money for the most part don’t give a crap about you as an individual.  Smaller companies tend to have people who are more in touch.  A lot of people have access to the general public’s private personal information.  A lot of people you don’t know have access to almost everything about you.  There is no such thing as privacy.  And customer service sucks across the board for the most part.

Now, I got a lot of feedback about missing work to take care of this stuff, but you know what?  I have missed work already a couple of times because of it, and I am still not done cleaning up the mess. Identity theft is the gift that keeps on giving.

Who is at Fault?

As much as some people on Digg want to point out that I am at fault for some of this, it’s hard to hear that when information about you that is non-private is all a thief needs to walk into a bank and clean out your checking account.  Now, I did lose my wallet… Or it was stolen.  On that part I’m not sure.  It’s not like the guy used my debit card.  That was canceled immediately.

I did have a high balance in my checking account, but it was an interest bearing account which was just moved out of a CD for reasons I don’t feel I need to explain to the internet.  I’m not irresponsible with my money or my identity.  Sure, I could have taken more paranoid measures to try and lock it up, in retrospect I wish I did.  But I don’t think I need to be any more paranoid than I already am, and if a theif can walk into a bank with a fake ID and take out 40k without any problems, then no amount of credit monitoring or home security would have helped.  And I didn’t know you could put alerts on your accounts, I never thought I needed to.  I trusted the bank’s system. I thought those kind of alerts were a given.

I have a home security system, and a home surveillance system.  I own a gun, which comes with it’s own set of problems but still, it’s another type of home security.  I don’t write my passwords down anywhere.  I watch people closely.  I’m not paranoid, but I am not mindlessly fumbling around in life waiting to become a victim.  I thought I was doing what I was supposed do, but of course, now I’m much more vigilant about such things.

But the problem still remains.  As long as the system is designed so that numerous people have easy access to your personal information and your money, you will *always* be relying on somebody else to protect them.

Also FYI- I was told from a person in the fraud department that I should be getting a call from Bank of America’s executive communications people.  Stay tuned, I’ll post their response to the problems I encountered.  I’ll also be posting the actions Bank of America has taken since the crime occured.  Bank of America has already paid the claim, so I have my money back.

I used to think identity theft was just an over-hyped gimmick to get people to pay for credit reports and monitoring. That is, until my checking account was cleared out. Turns out, most major banks are not well equipped to handle ID theft, or even your money for that matter.

It was a Sunday night a few weeks back, and I went to Target to grab some groceries. I had been swimming most of the day, so I was still in my board shorts. With no pockets. So I had my wallet *firmly* in hand the whole time.  I run through target, grab my stuff, pay with my debit card, and head out to pack my car up- still clutching my wallet. This was the last time I saw that wallet. Nothing suspicious had happened. I spotted nobody that set off my spidey sense (other than the sleeve tattoos and multiple piercings from the girl running the register, but that’s not exactly suspicious).

When getting ready for work the next day, my wallet was missing. I know where my wallet is at all times. This was really strange. I ripped my house apart, searching every square inch.  I even rummaged through the garbage (in AZ heat, the term “hot garbage” is not a simile) before I realized it really was gone. So I reviewed the security footage from my home surveillance system to see if anybody broke in while I was sleeping. No signs of entry. The wallet was just gone. Could have been lost, could have been stolen, but I had no clues to go on.

So, I call work to let them know I’m taking the day off.  I had to get to a Bank of America branch and the DMV to cancel my debit card and get a new license. Got home and checked my online banking, and there was no sign of suspicious activity. So, I figured the wallet was lost, the bank card is useless, and there isn’t much somebody can do with my driver’s license; I figured everything was cool. Had a frustrating day, so I head back to the pool  to relax and have a beer.

Everything is business as usual for the next few days. Until late Thursday night, I got a call from the Phoenix Police Department. The officer said they had a subject in custody who had two forms of ID with my information on it.  Then the guy asked what I looked like. At first I thought it was a prank because people were joking around the office that I missed work on a Monday because I “lost my wallet”. As the officer began rattling off my personal information, I quickly realized this was no joke.

They said they caught this guy at BestBuy trying to use somebody else’s credit card to buy a whole bunch of computers. Apparently BestBuy’s register system pops up an alert code if there is somebody trying to use a card that has been reported lost or stolen, and they call the cops. Impressive. The police caught the guy red handed. With drugs. And paraphernalia. And a bunch of people’s personal information.

At the time, I thought they got the sucker before he could do any real damage. But just to be safe, I checked with Bank of America. I was shocked to see my account was overdrawn by almost $300. Last I checked, I had almost 40k in there.

A quick review turned up 5 suspicious transactions. Two were deposits, and three were withdrawals. All five transactions occurred *inside* five different Bank of America banking centers. What amazed me most is the final two transactions. A withdrawal of 26k. And later that day, another withdrawal of 12.5k. Way to spot suspicious activity Bank of America. They handed the guy almost 40k in cash in one day.

Turns out the first two transactions where not just deposits. They were checks written to me, Christopher Hooley. The first one was $6200. The guy kept $5k and left $1200 in my account. The next one was a day later at a different center for $7500. Again, the guy kept $5k. I saw the debit slip online, and this guy’s signature wasn’t even a remote attempt to copy mine. To make matters worse, it turns out he was forging checks from another valley business, who subsequently called the police on ME!

After seeing his writing, all of the sudden it felt personal. That was MY name, written as sloppily as I had ever seen it. Now I had to find out who this guy was.

A detective from the Phoenix PD was already assigned to my case. I never actually even spoke with him. I sent the detective an email with the list of fraudulent transactions on my bank account and that was pretty much all he needed. But I had his email address, so I shot him an email asking who the thief was.

The detective told me the suspect’s name was Christopher Cantrell. An identity thief heavily involved in drugs. That’s all I needed to know to find his case on MCSO.org. And right there in front of me was his mug shot and list of charges.

Check this out:

CANTRELL, CHRISTOPHER MCKAY #P438548

Booked: 07-09-2008

Sex: MALE
Race: WHITE
D.O.B: 10-11-1975
Height: 5′09
Weight: 200
Eye: BROWN
Hair: BLACK

In Custody For:
001 FELONY COUNT OF DANGEROUS DRUG-POSS FOR SALE
001 FELONY COUNT OF THEFT-CONTROL PROPERTY
001 FELONY COUNT OF ADMIT TKT-FRAUD CREATION/POSS
001 FELONY COUNT OF FORGERY-W/WRITTEN INSTRUMENT
005 FELONY COUNT OF FORGERY-POSS FORGED INSTRUMENT
001 FELONY COUNT OF FORGERY-POSS FORGED INSTRUMENT
001 FELONY COUNT OF FORGERY-POSS FORGED INSTRUMENT
001 FELONY COUNT OF FORGERY-OFFERS FORGED INSTRUM
001 FELONY COUNT OF TAKING IDENTITY OF ANOTHER
001 FELONY COUNT OF TAKING IDENTITY OF ANOTHER
001 FELONY COUNT OF TAKING IDENTITY OF ANOTHER
001 FELONY COUNT OF DANGEROUS DRUG-POSS/USE
001 FELONY COUNT OF DRUG PARAPHERNALIA-POSSESS/USE

As you can see from the picture above the huge rap sheet, he’s pretty much a spitting image of me. So it’s understandable why 5 separate bank of America branches where confused, and allowed him to make huge cash withdrawals. He has trusting eyes.

But just for conjecture’s sake, here’s a picture of me.

The moral of this story is, if you want to steal somebody’s identity, you don’t need to mess with all that online stuff. Just get somebody’s info, make a fake license with your picture on it, and walk right into any Bank of America branch and just ask them to hand you the money in cash. It doesn’t matter if you look like a doper, or even if you’re on drugs at the time. Doesn’t even matter if you know your victim’s signature. All you need is their name and address and a fake ID, and you can clean out any Bank of America account!

In my next post. I’ll explain the aftermath and how Bank of America’s service is only second to their ability to protect your money from identity thieves. Stay tuned.

Patrick Sexton, if that is your real name, I am in Phoenix. And it is possible to contact me through this site. I tried to comment on YOUR POST but as it turns out, comments are not allowed. What are you afraid of?  There is also no contact info on your site.  I call FOUL!  I CALL FAIL!!!

I am calling you out.

Call me, text me, IM me. I will put you under the table, and you will cry like a sissy girl.  And we’ll videotape it and post it to YouTube so the world knows who’s the moffuggin’ man, and who’s perpetraytin’ a fraud!

The time has come to announced the winners for the 2008 SEO Superlatives. But before the announcement, I’d like to thank everybody who contributed. The SEO Superlatives Committee was awesome. All you crazy guys and gals who where socializing this, kick ass. Thanks so much for making this contest so much fun!

And without any further, here are your winners!

SEO Most Likely to Succeed
Danny Sullivan
SEO Conference Clown
Chris Hooley
In the running: Neil Patel
Best SEO Couple
Carolyn Shelby and Dave Rohrer
In the running: Greg and Barbara Boser
Best Dressed SEO
Brett Tabke
In the running: Kid Disco
SEO Party Animal
Chris Hooley
SEO’s Best Hairdo
Chris Winfield
SEO’s Biggest Flirt
Kimber Cook
In the running: Lisa Barone, Becky Ryan
Smartest SEO
Stephan Spencer
In the running: Aaron Wall,Bill Slawski
Most Athletic SEO
Cameron Olthuis
Best SEO Blogger
Lisa Barone
In the running: Loren Baker
Best Smile
Jane Copland
Best SEO Conference
Search Marketing Expo
In the running: PubCon
Best SEO Conference Speaker
Matt McGee
Best SEO You’ve Never Heard Of
Jeff Dempsey
In the running: Jon Heinl, Karl Ribas
Most Creative SEO
Lyndon Antcliff
Most Likely To Be Banned
Quadzilla
Biggest SEO Nerd
Aaron Wall
In the running: Neil Patel, Barry Schwartz,Bill Slawski
Best SEO Nickname/Handle
SexySEO
In the running: Captain Thundercock, FeedtheBot, the MadHat
Cutt’s Pet
Rand Fishkin
Best Technical SEO
Stephan Spencer
Top Linkbaiter
Andy Hagans (RIP!)
In the running (CLOSE RACE!): Lyndon Antcliff , Matt Inman
Best Up and Coming SEO
Eric Lander
In the running: Gab Goldenberg, Rhea Drysdale, Melanie Nathan
SEO Social Media Addict
Tamar Weinberg
In the running: Chris Winfield, Brent Csutoras
Biggest Google Fanboy
Ann Smarty
In the running: Brent D. Payne
Least Likely to Date Hooley
Jill Whalen
In the running: Greg Boser
Biggest PageRank
Matt Cutts
In the running: Bruce Clay
Most Fiery SEO
Michael Gray
In the running: Rae Hoffman
SEO Most Likely to Become President
Barry Schwartz
In the running: Danny Sullivan
Most Likely To Get Kicked Out Of The Bar
Chris Hooley
In the running: Rae Hoffman, Greg Boser
Most Likely To Close The Bar
Chris Hooley
In the running: Rae Hoffman, Patrick Sexton
The SEO You’d Be Most Afraid To Bring Home to Mom
Rae Hoffman
Most Feared in SEO
Matt Cutts
Mr / Ms Congeniality
Rand Fishkin
In the running: Vanessa Fox
Most Likely to Start an Argument
Michael Martinez
In the running: Michael Gray, Doug Heil
Most Likely to Win an Argument (even if they’re wrong!)
Rae Hoffman
Best Tweeter
Chris Winfield
In the running: Todd Friesen
Noisiest SEO
Chris Hooley
Most Traveled SEO
Danny Sullivan
Snarkiest SEO
Rebecca Kelley
Best SEO Ranter
Michael Gray
Most Networked SEO
Matt McGee
SEO Hater Award
Jason Calacanis
In the running: Jason Gambert
SEO’s Biggest Douchebag
Jason Gambert (forgettable SEO Trademark guy)

The Results

The winners were chosen almost 100% from the unfiltered voting results, allowing SEOs to game the voting system to the best of their abilities. And game they did.

There were more polls that only voted for one single person than completed surveys. IN all, half the votes were spam. HALF. Numerous nominees, especially in the categories for unknown or up and coming SEOs had bots voting themselves up in an almost embarrasingly traceable way. Same IP from nominee’s city votes for self 100 times in an hour? yep. Lots of that. Rushes of voters from India, Russia, Malaysia, and Poland overnight? Some of that too.

Despite attempts at altering the vote, much like Google we also had manual review. And much like Google, the popular vote still overpowered the spam for the most part, so the committee’s job was pretty darn easy in that regard.

Below are the unfiltered results of the vote.

As you’ll see, the committe only chose one or two winners over the unfiltered voting results. And sorry Michael, but it’s hard to believe you’re more feared than Matt Cutts in the SEO world.

Report: SEO Superlatives Summary - Compiled 07/04/08

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1. SEO Most Likely to Succeed

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Danny Sullivan	228	41.76%
Barry Schwartz	159	29.12%
Rand Fishkin	80	14.65%
Aaron Wall	54	9.89%
Todd Friesen	25	4.58%

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2. SEO Conference Clown

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Chris Hooley	309	60.00%
Neil Patel	166	32.23%
Darren Slatten	23	4.47%
Gab Goldberg	14	2.72%
Gab Goldenberg	3	0.58%

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3. Best SEO Couple

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Carolyn Shelby and Dave Rohrer	197	38.70%
Greg and Barbara Boser	161	31.63%
Chris Hooley and Anna Rule	94	18.47%
David & Irma Wallace	30	5.89%
Jeff Quipp & Jennifer Osborne	27	5.30%

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4. Best Dressed SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Brett Tabke	208	38.88%
Kid Disco	127	23.74%
Pamela Lund	87	16.26%
Mikkel deMib Svendsen	66	12.34%
Pimp McFly	47	8.79%

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5. SEO Party Animal

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Chris Hooley	238	45.33%
Todd Friesen	76	14.48%
David Harry	54	10.29%
Rae Hoffman	51	9.71%
Kid Disco	32	6.10%
Frank Watson	31	5.90%
Greg Boser	18	3.43%
Jon Heinl	11	2.10%
Greg Hartnett	8	1.52%
Aaron Chronister	6	1.14%

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6. SEO’s Best Hairdo

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Chris Winfield	361	69.16%
Dana Todd	61	11.69%
Greg Boser	44	8.43%
Krazy Korean	32	6.13%
David Harry	24	4.60%

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7. SEO’s Biggest Flirt

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Kimber Cook	161	34.26%
Lisa Barone	131	27.87%
Becky Ryan	84	17.87%
Lora Lufark	50	10.64%
Patrick Sexton	44	9.36%

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8. Smartest SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Stephan Spencer	278	52.85%
Aaron Wall	113	21.48%
Bill Slawski	79	15.02%
Rand Fishkin	40	7.60%
Brent D. Payne	12	2.28%
Joe Sinkwytz	4	0.76%

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9. Most Athletic SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Cameron Olthuis	247	49.40%
Becky Ryan	102	20.40%
Barry Schwartz	96	19.20%
Kid Disco	55	11.00%

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10. Best SEO Blogger

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Lisa Barone	230	42.28%
Loren Baker	109	20.04%
Rebecca Kelley	50	9.19%
Aaron Wall	46	8.46%
Barry Schwartz	41	7.54%
Jane Copland	35	6.43%
Ann Smarty	20	3.68%
Bill Slawski	13	2.39%

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11. Best Smile

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Jane Copland	276	51.21%
Becky Ryan	104	19.29%
Chris Winfield	62	11.50%
Zak Nicola	52	9.65%
Danny Sullivan	22	4.08%
Lyndsay Walker	18	3.34%
Greg Boser	5	0.93%

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12. Best SEO Conference

Nominee	Count	Percent %
SMX	392	75.24%
PubCon	96	18.43%
SES	33	6.33%

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13. Best SEO Conference Speaker

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Matt McGee	227	45.77%
Stephan Spencer	83	16.73%
Rand Fishkin	71	14.31%
Todd Friesen	44	8.87%
Greg Boser	35	7.06%
Neil Patel	22	4.44%
Jeremy Schoemaker	14	2.82%

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14. Best SEO You’ve Never Heard Of

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Jeff Dempsey	131	20.44%
Justin Boeckman (asked to be removed from the competition)	92	14.35%
Michael Streko	88	13.73%
Kay Dinsdale	82	12.79%
Jon Heinl	64	9.98%
Karl Ribas	64	9.98%
Clint Danks	28	4.37%
Lyndsay Walker	26	4.06%
Melanie Phung	26	4.06%
Leslie Rohde	21	3.28%
Adam Moro	19	2.96%

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15. Most Creative SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Lyndon Antcliff	223	42.88%
Michael Gray	187	35.96%
Aaron Wall	59	11.35%
Jeremy Schoemaker	46	8.85%
Michael Campbell	5	0.96%

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16. Most Likely To Be Banned

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Quadzilla	280	54.26%
Dave Naylor	103	19.96%
Slightly Shady SEO	88	17.05%
Irish Wonder	27	5.23%
Earl Gray	18	3.49%

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17. Biggest SEO Nerd

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Aaron Wall	151	27.61%
Neil Patel	137	25.05%
Barry Schwartz	113	20.66%
Bill Slawski	96	17.55%
Tim Nash	28	5.12%
Dan Thies	17	3.11%
Adam Moro	5	0.91%

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18. Best SEO Nickname/Handle

Nominee	Count	Percent %
SexySEO	158	29.48%
Captain Thundercock	139	25.93%
FeedtheBot	96	17.91%
the MadHat	64	11.94%
Seocracy	30	5.60%
SearchBuzz	18	3.36%
SEO Idiot	18	3.36%
OldSchoolSEO	13	2.43%

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19. Cutt’s Pet

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Rand Fishkin	235	44.34%
Shari Thurow;	136	25.66%
Danny Sullivan	104	19.62%
Melanie Nathan	25	4.72%
Audrey Sieberling	21	3.96%
Lyndsay Walker	9	1.70%

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20. Best Technical SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Stephan Spencer	265	51.36%
Aaron Wall	92	17.83%
Bill Slawski	52	10.08%
Hamlet Batista	47	9.11%
Dan Thies	30	5.81%
Joe Sinkwytz	30	5.81%

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21. Top Linkbaiter

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Andy Hagans (RIP!)	134	25.52%
Lyndon Antcliff	130	24.76%
Matt Inman	125	23.81%
Todd Malicoat	43	8.19%
Rand Fishkin	39	7.43%
Neil Patel	35	6.67%
Debra Mastaler	19	3.62%

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22. Best Up and Coming SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Eric Lander	198	37.50%
Gab Goldenberg	74	14.02%
Rhea Drysdale	67	12.69%
Melanie Nathan	60	11.36%
Jon Heinl	47	8.90%
Darren Slatten	37	7.01%
Doug Heil	18	3.41%
Melanie Phung	15	2.84%
Jeffrey Smith (couldn’t find his blog / site)	12	2.27%

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23. SEO Social Media Addict

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Tamar Weinberg	226	36.63%
Chris Winfield	187	30.31%
Brent Csutoras	65	10.53%
Zak Nicola	45	7.29%
Lee Odden	26	4.21%
Martin Bowling	25	4.05%
Barry Schwartz	24	3.89%
Brent Cstustoras (lol!)	16	2.59%
Tad Chef	3	0.49%

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24. Biggest Google Fanboy

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Ann Smarty	238	49.90%
Brent D. Payne	194	40.67%
Alex Chitu	45	9.43%

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25. Least Likely to Date Hooley

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Jill Whalen	222	44.49%
Greg Boser	110	22.04%
Matt Cutts	84	16.83%
Stoney DeGeytor	60	12.02%
Dave Naylor	23	4.61%

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26. Biggest PageRank

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Matt Cutts	225	44.29%
Bruce Clay	192	37.80%
Aaron Wall	64	12.60%
Danny Sullivan	27	5.31%

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27. Most Fiery SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Michael Gray	262	50.48%
Rae Hoffman	169	32.56%
Aaron Chronister	54	10.40%
Michael Martinez	23	4.43%
David Harry	11	2.12%

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28. SEO Most Likely to Become President

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Barry Schwartz	217	41.65%
Danny Sullivan	159	30.52%
Rand Fishkin	70	13.44%
Jason Calacanis	41	7.87%
Andy Beal	34	6.53%

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29. Most Likely To Get Kicked Out Of The Bar

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Chris Hooley	189	36.99%
Rae Hoffman	150	29.35%
Greg Boser	67	13.11%
Aaron Chronister	52	10.18%
Dave Naylor	39	7.63%
David Harry	8	1.57%
Earl Gray	6	1.17%

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30. Most Likely To Close The Bar

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Chris Hooley	205	42.01%
Rae Hoffman	122	25.00%
Patrick Sexton	84	17.21%
Kid Disco	30	6.15%
Melanie Nathan	27	5.53%
Aaron Chronister	13	2.66%
Jon Heinl	7	1.43%

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31. The SEO You’d Be Most Afraid To Bring Home to Mom

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Rae Hoffman	234	48.55%
Dave Naylor	70	14.52%
Chris Hooley	64	13.28%
Michael Martinez	64	13.28%
Greg Boser	26	5.39%
Earl Gray	13	2.70%
David Harry	11	2.28%

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32. Most Feared in SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Michael Gray	202	38.62%
Matt Cutts	171	32.70%
Rae Hoffman	66	12.62%
Dave Naylor	38	7.27%
Greg Boser	24	4.59%
Lora Lufark	22	4.21%

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33. Mr / Ms Congeniality

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Rand Fishkin	230	43.98%
Vanessa Fox	130	24.86%
Chris Sherman	74	14.15%
Dazzlin Donna	62	11.85%
Barry Schwartz	27	5.16%

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34. Most Likely to Start an Argument

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Michael Martinez	140	26.57%
Michael Gray	105	19.92%
Doug Heil	98	18.60%
Jill Whalen	62	11.76%
Rae Hoffman	55	10.44%
Darren Slatten	49	9.30%
Dave Naylor	12	2.28%
Brian Turner (couldn’t find his site)	6	1.14%

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35. Most Likely to Win an Argument (even if they’re wrong!)

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Rae Hoffman	208	40.08%
Rand Fishkin	150	28.90%
Li Evans	84	16.18%
Jill Whalen	44	8.48%
Dazzlin Donna	18	3.47%
Shari Thurow;	15	2.89%

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36. Best Tweeter

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Chris Winfield	290	55.24%
Todd Friesen	141	26.86%
Lee Odden	49	9.33%
Melanie Nathan	45	8.57%

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37. Noisiest SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Chris Hooley	244	53.74%
Brent D. Payne	126	27.75%
Darren Slatten	84	18.50%

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38. Most Traveled SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Danny Sullivan	189	37.43%
Todd Friesen	155	30.69%
Mike Grehan	84	16.63%
David Temple	45	8.91%
Lee Odden	32	6.34%

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39. Best SEO Ranter

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Michael Gray	281	52.52%
Lisa Barone	155	28.97%
Michael Martinez	46	8.60%
Michael VanDeMar	29	5.42%
David Harry	19	3.55%
Darren Slatten	5	0.93%

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40. Most Networked SEO

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Matt McGee	230	40.49%
Danny Sullivan	158	27.82%
Tamar Weinberg	95	16.73%
Lee Odden	43	7.57%
Chris Winfield	42	7.39%

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41. SEO Hater Award

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Jason Calacanis	275	52.38%
Jeremy Schoemaker	97	18.48%
Jason Gambert (forgettable SEO trademark guy)	83	15.81%
Dave Pasternack	38	7.24%
Michael Gray	32	6.10%

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42. Biggest SEO DoucheBag

Nominee	Count	Percent %
Jason Gambert (forgettable SEO trademark guy)	530	100.00%

THANKS SO MUCH to all who participated! I owe a lotta people beers on this one. David made some AWESOME badges for all nominees and winners. Feel free to grab one, and proudly display it on your blog! Linking back is optional (srsly, I pinged Matt Cutts like 10x on this blog post) but if you do, you know I got nuttin but love for ya.

Next post up will be a more in depth analysis on how this whole thing went down. I thought some of the behind the scenes stuff was really interesting. I’ll also have a post for those who got shafted this time around. There were a bunch of people who would have been nominated that were not, and a bunch of categories that would have been fun. We’ll get them in next time. But for this year, we’ll call the next vote the "SEO Shafties!" - coming soon peeps :-)