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This morning has been kinda cool. Got a ton of Happy Birthday emails from random forums that I apparently joined one time (robots can be so sweet sometimes), a bunch of MySpace and FaceBook comments, emails and text messages from friends and family, and a sweet voicemail from my sweetheart wanting to be first to wish me a happy birthday.
Ya know, it feels good knowing people care… about an old ass man with wrinkly old man junk who is losing his hair and no longer knows the difference between “cool” and “on sale”.
Dudes and dudettes, here it comes. Mid Life Crisis Time. Instead of buying a fast italian sports car and boob jobs for random hot 22 year olds, I think I’m gonna give back to the community.
Those who know me, know I am a big fan of CONSOLIDATION of any sort. I don’t care if it’s student loans, liquid assets, affiliate reporting system interfaces, or anything else for that matter. I want it all in the same place at the same time. That being said, these scattered b-day wishes need a single point, a funnel if you will.
So here’s the deal blog buddies, if you want to console me through my miserable day of wearing garters and hating myself for not being 21, do it here. A simple Happy Birthday will do. And here’s the critical part of the crisis, it’s worth a link so all you fuckers better do it. Even the ones who don’t show up to my super dope party (AKA assholes).
So happy birthday to me. Make some comments up in this bitch, I wanna crack 50 if possible so at least I feel like I am loved even if I am on my way to impotence and wearing adult diapers.
Tags: 30, 30th-Birthday, Chris Hooley, Fun Stuff, Happy-Birthday, Mid-Life-Crisis, Noise, Personal
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Leave YOUR Comments!
SnoopBloggyBlawg Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:19 am
Happy Birthday M.C. SAGGY BALLZ!!!!
Ump Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:20 am
ive known ya a long time bro..cant wait to start doin some damage next month. Happy Birthday.
PS..shit dont stop workin till ya hit 32-33…I’ve got a list and the order it starts to occur. Just let me know if ya need it.
Ump
Jeff Dempsey Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:21 am
OLD!
Jeff Dempsey Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:22 am
Oh and happy birthday… 30 is the new 20 or something like that
Carolyn Shelby Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:22 am
Welcome to the over 30 club :P
I swear you don’t look a day over 24.
PPC Guy Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:24 am
Happy birthday Chris, even though your getting older your still a web Pimp. I remember the first time you back handed the keyboard.
markus941 Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:26 am
You are too “on sale” for school, bro!
May the hairs on your head consolidate themselves into tufty patches of mid-life-sexyness and your bank accounts overflow like the … [something]
Happy Birthday, Chris! Keep truckin. KIT. RHAS.
KrazyKorean Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:27 am
Chris: Hey ladies
Ladies: Well hello there handsome
Chris: You fine ladies wanna come to my Bday party this sat
Ladies: Of course we would, we will bring our thongs
Chris: Nice you guys are going to make my 30th AWESOME
Ladie: EWWWWW 30!@#$ nvm, I forgot I had to babysit that day
windowns Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:30 am
Happy Birthday you crazy man you.
Cygnus Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:34 am
Happy birthday to a guy that is clearly prepared for old age, given that you already live in Sun City…I realize it must be getting harder for you to hit on tootheless old ladies with Mrs Robinson complexes, but you shouldn’t give up hope.
Is there going to be any adult entertainment?
I will try to get my wife and daughter over to your place, in BFE Sun City, AZ.
Jess Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:35 am
Happy Birthday Boss man!
Rhona Melsky Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:40 am
If you’re old, then what am I? OK, I won’t take offense, at least this time! :) Happy 30th! It actually gets better from now on!
Tamar Weinberg Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 10:49 am
You still do look 21 though. Happy Birthday!!!!!
Dan Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 11:14 am
happy bday man. it’s cool you can still chill with me if you want, and i’m 23. we’ll avg out to 26 and a half so we can snag all the girlies from 21-32
Aaron Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 11:21 am
Get with it! Happy 30, here’s to being able to drink like a real man (aka: alcoholic)
Joachim Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 11:35 am
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
- Unknown
Cameron Olthuis Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 11:51 am
happy fockin birthday! 1977 huh, isn’t that same year dirt was born?
Nathania Johnson Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 12:43 pm
Happy Birthday. Please stop saying 30 is midlife b/c I turn that very age next January.
kid disco Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 12:44 pm
I would definitely have chosen the Mini Moxie, but here’s your comment!
Happy fucking birthday! :P
Dan Perry Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 12:45 pm
Yo, Happy Birthday! Wait; is it still cool to say “Yo”, or did that go away when MTV stopped rapping?
pratt Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 1:03 pm
Happy fuckin’ birthday!
Thanks for that pic of the hot 22 year old! Haha.
David Wallace Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 2:30 pm
Old? Man you ain’t old til you hit 40 like me. You’re still a puppy you youngin’.
Happy birthday, man. See you Saturday (most likely).
Jason Murphy Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 3:51 pm
Hooley! I’m smelling your oldness all the way from Vegas! Stop eating the garlic pills and prune juice already, life is just getting started! (I turn 30 in 2008).
Seriosly, Happy Birthday man. Thanks for keeping the SEO world out of suits and ties. Here’s to the next 30! [raises drinkbait glass]
SEO Loser Says:
April 19th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
HAPPY BDAY BRO! I’m turning 23 tomorrow and you look like you’re in much better shape than me (http://www.flickr.com/photos/7844335@N02/462434665/ ).
Congrats!
Pete Wailes Says:
April 20th, 2007 at 1:53 am
Happpppppppppppppppy Birthhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhday!
Enjoy it, biatch! :)
Andrea Says:
April 20th, 2007 at 4:33 pm
just remember, i’ll always be younger than you :P hahah
love ya bro! happy bday!
Jon Says:
April 20th, 2007 at 5:37 pm
Happy 30th Birthday old man. The Red Sox are going to lose to the Yankees!! Woooooo!!
I hope to chill with you again at the next conference. Hit me up for free passes to Affiliate Summit East. We need more guys like you over there in Miami to party it up with free booze and hot girls (not hotter than your gf — that was just for her).
Chris Hooley Says:
April 20th, 2007 at 8:32 pm
aa hahahaa. Eat your words Jon. BoSox have heart. Janks have money. Score one for the home team!
Hit me up offline about the Affiliate Summit - my contact info is on my contact page :-)
Joe Whyte Says:
April 21st, 2007 at 5:22 pm
You are wicked awsome. Is 30 really a mid life crisis?
Nah but I love the hot 22 year olds and fast italian sports car idea!!
Rach Says:
April 21st, 2007 at 7:46 pm
Yo Dawg, check it out.. the big Three - Oh! I am super proud of you - love you lots! R!~
Rae Says:
April 22nd, 2007 at 10:03 am
Happy birthday Hooley - wish I could have flown in to spend it with ya! :)
SEO Fangirl Says:
April 22nd, 2007 at 6:21 pm
From one old fart (according to Eurostar) to another, Happy Birthday! I still think you and the rest of the band will be super sexy climbing the hill.
xx
Fangirl
joshua Says:
April 22nd, 2007 at 7:01 pm
Your beer garden was kind of a big deal. Happy birthday dude.
Brendon Says:
April 22nd, 2007 at 8:57 pm
Happy, happy birthday.
May your life be filled with joy, love and…………….beer.
Ken Savage Says:
April 22nd, 2007 at 9:52 pm
Happy bday old man. I got 5 years on ya. How do you think I feel. But my wife is only 29 so I’m living some kinda charmed life.
Enjoy my man.
Ken Savage Says:
April 22nd, 2007 at 9:53 pm
oh yea btw Jon, How’d your Yankees do?
4 homers in a home? The 4 bumper stickers on my Jeep saying it correctly. YANKEES SUCK
RollMeDice Says:
April 25th, 2007 at 2:45 am
Happy B-Day from the Netherlands Chris. Enjoy your day (and try not to fall asleep… I know how you oldies tend to doze off every opportunity you get!) ;-)
Brooke Says:
April 25th, 2007 at 2:55 pm
Happy Birthday from all of us at StudentLoanConsolidator! That’s right, we snoop at our competitors blogs!
Johnny Says:
April 26th, 2007 at 5:19 pm
man..guess i was a few days late. but happy birthday. the big 3-0. :)
shor Says:
May 7th, 2007 at 11:06 pm
Only a month late but what do you expect, I’m from Australia.
You wanted 50 comments so I figured I’d help out. 40 sounds a lot better than 39 (unless we’re talking age where 29 sounded a lot better than 30! HAH)
Hope you had a good one.
David Wilkinson Says:
July 3rd, 2007 at 1:18 pm
Nearing two and a half months late (who am I kidding ‘nearing’) but what the hell. Happy Birthday - Big man! :D
I’ll make it 41 comments. ;) As for the crisis shabizzle? You’re in a tizzy ’bout nothing. You’re the best freaking SEO d00d this side of… Um… A long way. You’re HOT in the blogging community and you’ve got one helluva reputation. Aside from all that - YOU DA MAN!
David Wilkinson
Janet Says:
July 27th, 2007 at 3:26 pm
LoL - You’re page made me crack up….”I’m thinking where the heck did this funny guy come from?” lol
Happy Late Birthday….
By the way, random 22 yr olds huh? lol My birthday is coming up this month :-) Gonna be 22 ;-)